A Working Map of Philadelphia’s Best Drunk Food

It’s 2 AM. You’re a little drunk.

Actually, you’re very drunk.

… You’re shitfaced.

It’s time to stumble out of the bar into the street and drunkenly convince your friends that the night is far from over. The bars may be closed, Tinder may not be giving you too many matches, and your fuck-buddy may or may not be ignoring your texts, but why should that ruin your night? The night is warm, you’re not ready to go to bed alone, and The Republican is still serving drinks anyway. You make the ever-so-eliquant argument to your friends that night is still young and God damn it, you just want one more drink while getting a lap dance on a sofa that’s older than the girl who’s giving it to you. “Trust me, dude.” You slur to your friend who’s still on the fence. “This place is legit.”

But first, tacos.

No, wait… Cheesesteaks.

No, Chinese!


If you’re going to go on any further, you’re going to need some greasy, fatty, alcohol-absorbing grub to keep you from passing out on an impromptu stripping stage/coffee table, but you and your friends can’t decide on where to go. Fortunately for you guys, I have an enormous amount of experience on this very subject and made an idiot-proof map of where you should stumble to once your bar tab is paid with my favorite drunk grub spots, location and hour info, and pictures! With its recent influx of food trucks and street-side food stands (not to mention that the warm weather alone completely justifies you having “just one more drink”), drunk food has never been more accessible to Philadelphians. Here are the spots I’ve come to know as my drunken sanctuaries.

Enjoy (responsibly)!!


Know of a late night joint for us to check out? This map will be constantly updated so make sure to send me a message on the “Contact” page above with your recommendation. I’ll add it to the map once I try it out!


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